Spam Spam Spam Spam…

spam-spam-spamI don’t get a lot of comments on this blog – well, that’s not exactly true. Right now I have more than 1,100 comments awaiting my approval. While I don’t get the discussion I’d like, I do gets tons of fake comments – some impossibly generic, some grammatically hilarious and others completely off-topic. I thought I’d share them with you.

All of these spammers have one thing in common – two things, really. One, they all want to get my readers to visit their website, which is undoubtedly rife with malware, and two, they are all written in ridiculous English. When I read my comments, I always picture some obsessive spammer in a far away land, eyes wide, hyped up on coffee, punching words into an online translator.

I particularly like the ones who try to be so general that they can spam anyone without changing their message.

I know this site offers quality dependent posts and other material, is there any other web page which provides these kinds of things in quality?

Most of them try to complement the blog.

When someone writes an paragraph he/she maintains the idea of a user in his/her mind that how a user can understand it. So that’s why this piece of writing is perfect. Thanks!

Yeah, coming from a clarity expert like you, Dude, that means a lot.

Another way they try to make comments universal is to talk about the design.

This design is incredible! You obviously know how to keep a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

I might have fallen for that if a) I had an incredible design not provided by WordPress for free, or b) I had ever posted a video. Ever.

More flattery:

This piece of writing will help the internet users for setting up new blog or even a blog from start to end.

I am truly glad to glance at this weblog posts which contains lots of valuable data, thanks for providing such statistics.

Yeah, dude, maybe I’d buy that if I’d ever posted a statistic.

And then there are the ones who almost sound sincere. This one gets points for grammar, though.

Howdy! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be okay. I’m undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new posts.

There’s an f-ing Twitter button at the top of the page. Way to prove you’ve never even been to my site.

And then there are the ones that are completely off-topic. I have to admit, this guy tried really hard.

AT&T has been making great strides in service quality tying and in some cases outstripping their rival.
Analysts and pundits were off the mark with that prediction, as instead Apple chose to release the i – Phone 5C as a replacement for the i – Phone 5, which in the past the company would have continued to sell at a $99 price point on contract. On Friday, when the i – Phone 5 was released, it was discovered that Verizon i – Phones were SIM-unlocked.

Same guy, next comment.

Once you press the “Home” button, you will be prompted to use the fingerprint sensor in order to view anything on your phone. This is used to identify a user when unlocking the phone.If you need to unlock your phone, visit us at and find out more about the official i – Phone unlock service.

Same guy, third comment:

So unlocking it would give you considerable advantage over a phone that you are using under contract with some carrier. This is used to identify a user when unlocking the phone.This will appeal to young adults in their early 20’s and even teenagers who often beg for an i – Phone as their birthday gift.

Ok, spammers, that’s all the pixels you’re getting. Despite what you assume, I do read your comments and take great pleasure in deleting them.

I hope you all found their comments as entertaining as I do. See you next week!